Please give me your true opinion of my poem....?

Rain at last





I sit all alone so quietly reading.


Though noises I hear, I read on, unheeding.


Until that one sound that alone Iam needing;


The sound of the rain beginning to fall.


Of a sudden the book is back on the table,


I run out the door as quick as I'm able.


In slippery mud my feet are unstable,


But raindrops have beckoned, I've answered the call.





So here I am barefoot, the scent is breathtaking!


This shower is ecstasy, joy in the making.


In no time I'm drenched, with cold I am shaking,


But nothing can mar this joy that I feel.


This rain, the one reason that flowers are growing,


It cleanses my soul, my heart is o'erflowing.


And then thunder crashes; the wind how it's blowing!


I hear it, I feel it, I see it, it's real!





I can hardly believe it, so long have I waited,


To feel this crisp rain on my skin.


My mind is re-opened, no more am I jaded,


I feel so completed deep within.

Please give me your true opinion of my poem....?
Not that keen I am afraid. To me it is at though you have tried too hard to make the lines rhyme, and so not all the lines make sense, or appear backward, "until that one sound that alone I am needing", "with cold I am shaking", doesn't really make sense, rhyming for the sake of it.


And the last verse seems out of place, not as long, and not in the same style at all.


That said poetry is more for the person who writes it, and everyone is different, so if it makes you happy writing it, then cool.
Reply:i hate it
Reply:i like it i give it a 8/10
Reply:its kind of hard to follow and it doesn't make much sense





but it you changed it around some it could be good
Reply:Bravo ( crowd cheering) standing online ovation. it was great!
Reply:it has good potential, it just needs edited a bit ....


makes me feel like dancing in the rain ;O)
Reply:I liked it. I think you have a poweful voice and need to keep writing.
Reply:I get this poem! It's about a girl/boy who has never felt the rain but finally has he chance to feel the felling of the rain on their skin. It's the most beautiful thing in the world. I love it! I'm a poet myself.
Reply:Very well done. I too live in a dry climate. The scent of rain and dust is most treasured.
Reply:Like most "poetry" here it makes little if any sense, is written incorrectly (the form) and you obviously DON'T understand what poetry is about or why it is written. It is written basically for yourself, and it's all about imagery and illusion. It lifts the spirit and opens the mind and causes the reader to think and possibly question. Your poem (which really is not a poem at all) does none of this. It seems to be all about you ("I," "I," "I") and your sojourn into the rain and the wind, and all that jazz. It's very trite, mundane. I would try another pursuit.
Reply:Seriously


Started out well with good imagery, but went completely cheesy after first verse. Shows some budding talent.
Reply:I think this is not a poem, because only emotional not from how you feel about and how you understand about.
Reply:OH MY GOSH! IT'S GREAT! I write poems too! We should talk on email! Share poems, you know! I'd give it 10/10!





At first, i thought, oh dear, not another rubbish poet. But your poem was REALLY good!


Here's a bit of one of mine;





All Alone, But With Company





They try their hardest,


Try to run the fastest.


Jaded in backwards mode,


Forever alone.


Stuck in the middle,


Out comes a little giggle.


On my own,


Once again.


On my own,


But company within.





Like it!? It's the middle verse!
Reply:I really like it! It reminds me of myself in a weird way...I actually love the way all the lines flow together through rhyme! I think that it is really good and you should keep it up!
Reply:i love it.i wish i could write half as good.you should publish this.im giving you a star for this magnificant poem.please keep writing!
Reply:When i read it i thought of the rain as a metaphor but everyone seems to have tken it literally, how did you mean it? (ludownes@gmail.com) I really liked it though...and i think your punctuation works well!!! Brilliant, well done!

sorrel